Early this fall, I went over to a friend’s room for a little college football-watching session. Andrew Dwyer was there of course—would he ever miss an opportunity to hang out and watch football—but something was different about him. Something about his hair—

He had cut his hair into a mullet.

And this wasn’t your everyday, hockey-player, I –missed-a-haircut, accidental mullet. It was a work of art: top hair slicked back, side hair shorn almost to the point of nonexistence. Business in the front, party in the back.

Meanwhile, Andrew had on his classic ensemble—Fisher’s Island golf shirt, shorts, and Reefs—hardly congruent with the new ‘do.

“I like the haircut,” I remarked.

Those of you who knew Andrew know what happened next. He shrugged, as if it were nothing out of the ordinary, and in a completely serious tone explained,

“I’m just keeping it real.”

I’m going to miss his sense of humor.

It was subtle, hard to explain in writing, but never failed to make me laugh to the point where I felt self-conscious. I can remember exactly how he delivered his trademark lines, and the look on his face when he’d say them. He was always smiling—that’s what I remember most.

From time to time, at like 2 a.m., we’d have long, earnest conversations, sometime outside Toad’s, sometimes on Instant Messenger, in which we’d discuss the important things in life: TV shows and movie quotes, usually.

I consider myself a movie quote connoisseur, but he had me smoked every time. I stumped him once, pulling out the “meow” line from “Super Troopers,” which he immediately contested because “Super Troopers” was not a classic, and he had not seen it.

“’Super Troopers’ is a modern classic,” I said.

He looked at me, shaking his head, clearly displeased. “The only modern classics are ‘Austin Powers,’ early Adam Sandler, and Chris Farley movies,” he said with a seriousness usually reserved by most people for discussing the economy or politics.

I’m going to miss our conversations. They were sometimes serious, sometimes sarcastic, always funny, always refreshing. Andrew kept me on my toes, and if I made a comment, a joke, or a statement that wasn’t up to par, he’d let me know.

Last Wednesday, a week ago from the time I write this, Andrew walked me home from Toad’s. This was nothing new—he’d helped me home from many a toads’ night—but this time I was quite a handful. I’d lost my jacket somewhere inside and was cold and in tears, worried what my mom would do to me when she would found out that I was down a jacket, a cell phone, and wallet.

But like the friend he was, Andrew dealt with me. He gave me his jacket and walked me to my room. On the way, I managed to trip and fall, biting partway through my tongue in the process and sending myself in hysterics.

The next day, he sent me an IM, teasing me for being, in his words, an emotional roller coaster. I told him I’d bring his jacket by his room.

When I got there, he had already left for New York City.

I’m going to miss his friendship.

I still have the cut in my tongue that I sustained that night. I figured he’d be giving me a hard time about it when he saw me next. I never would have thought it would outlast him.

I’ve been completely devastated lately, but then I get some images in my mind—Andrew as a roll of Lifesavers on Halloween, Andrew dancing it up at the DKE formal, Andrew heating up leftover sesame chicken on his George Foreman Grill, Andrew kicking back at his house at Fisher’s, Andrew lighting up when I mentioned his favorite two words: “Joe Millionaire,” Andrew wandering around the DKE backyard, missing a flip-flop but never missing a smile—and somehow, it makes me feel better.

He was always happy, he was always making everyone around him happy, and most importantly, he was always surrounded by people who loved him, right up to the end.

Andrew, I’m going to miss you.

--Katie Baker, Yale ‘05

There was this great guy on my Deer Hill Trip—The first week he was really shy, but occasionally he would crack some joke or one-liner that would have us laughing so hard we would fall out of our Crazy Creeks. In Canyon De Cheyelle we surveyed land and built a fence, all the while dodging barbed wire and cacti that would impair his “baby-making ability.” At night we would play Mafia; If I would smile he’d accuse me of being the killer, if I didn’t smile he’d accuse me of being the killer, keeping us in hysterics all the while. When I whined he would call the “wambulance” to keep me in check. In the mountains, the air wambulance boarded frequently at 12,000 feet. He kept me laughing through rough spots and dragged me up the mountain when I thought I would topple over from the weight of my pack. Throughout the trip he dodged all the green food and drooled over the cheeseburgers he dreamt of. At our final barbeque he managed to eat five cheeseburgers and three bowls of ice cream, patting his belly with that signature Andrew smile.

--Alyson Sudlow, Yale ‘04

Remarks to the School Sunday Evening, January 19, 2003

Robert H. Mattoon, Headmaster

Hotchkiss hasn’t been quite the same since Andrew graduated, and it definitely is not the same now since his death. Andrew was a great citizen of the School. He had a big heart, a great sense of humor, and a huge circle of friends. Snapshots of his time at Hotchkiss click easily into focus. Andrew, known to his close associates as “The Dogg” or just “Dogg,” making announcements in Auditoriums. Andrew on stage as a member of the Fin, Fur, and Feather Club. Andrew rooting on the hockey team in Schmidt Rink. Andrew exulting over wins on the lacrosse field. Andrew’s senior picture in the “Names and Faces,” where he appears not once but twice, first as Andrew Dwyer and then as Sean Dwyer. Andrew befriending faculty children. Andrew laughing. And Andrew reveling in the companionship of his friends. To be sure, Headmaster’s photo albums are inevitably incomplete. Much must be left to the imagination—the spring trips to Florida, the pranks in Dana, and the life at Yale. Fortunately, his friends and family have captured these memories, and they will live on forever.

As wonderful as it was to behold Andrew’s exterior exuberance, his serious side and sensitive side could not be missed. He took things in, he looked after others, he studied, he cared, he had ambitions, and he loved his friends and family.

To have known Andrew was a treat and a privilege, and to have known even a portion of his immediate and extended family has been, and will continue to be, a huge additional privilege. The Dwyer family is as loving and energetic and positive and supportive and strong as any family can be. To be with any one of them means being embraced by the bunch, and what warm feelings those associations convey. The Dwyer’s are also a Hotchkiss family, and with tem and with us Andrew’s memory rests secure.

Thank you.

I have never and will never meet someone who so many people called their best friend. He was always there to pick you up when you were down, always full of joy, wearing his huge grin, and always the life of the party. In every aspect, Andrew represented living life to the happiest- from his unique and ever ever-present sense of humor to his grilled cheese, cheese burgers, cheese dogs, and cheese sausages. It is incredible to think that he was able to touch so many of us in such a short time. He was the guy who, when all of us went to college, we bragged about to our new college friends. And he’ll be the person we will brag about to our kids and grandkids. Thank you Dogg for being the loyalist of friends.

--John Flinn

I, like any of us, could tell a thousand stories about Dogg. There was the time he slept over in my sister’s bed when no one was even supposed to be in the house, and the time he tried to convince me it was okay to drink the beer Nancy bought me at the Yankee-Red Sox game even though there was blood on the rim. Together we got caught tying to free Flinn’s goats, and sand Springsteen songs late at night in Jupiter after grilling. As a group we can all tell countless stories about the extraordinary number of great times with Dogg. However, what I will remember most about Dogg was the smile on his face that night in the city when I met up with him. Dogg has the unique gift of making everyone around him happy, and that night was no exception. He was so happy to see us and to sit down and talk about the Yankees and laugh about the Mets. What I will cherish forever about that night is being able to see him, smile with him, and laugh with him. Knowing how happy he was will forever make me happy. Thanks for always making me smile, Dogg.

-- Andrew Hughes

For Andrew Knox Dwyer

If I had one wish today, I would safely say, that I would want to remember our last conversation. As far as I can tell, from one to another cell, I remember almost everything anyway. But to share some of your cheer, or a couple more beers, for a couple more years would give my heart some peace. I can hear your laugh, you goon of a friend, so loyal you were to me…and to every other God dammed kid you met…and now your soul is free. Compassion and passion are very different things, yet you made it seem so easy…in your family, in your heart, on the links, even in your farts. You made it easy to combine your water with wine, fun never knew such an advocate. And how you loved to compete, not to mention eat, could you- would you have ever worn a suit? And I can skim through the pages of summers past, comparing our ages, and think of the one time I beat you in Beirut. So in the clouds you reside with a soundtrack of the tide and broken-record battle cry repeating. And if the Jets ultimately lose, you’ve got your Foreman and your booze, you’re in heaven, you Dogg…though it was fleeting. But I am glad I had the chance, to watch you “get down” and dance, to see you flirt with romance, and spill beer on your pants. And I can sigh someday, and safely day, to my son as he plays, that sport which you slayed, that I remember our last conversation.

-Ben Cameron

Memories of Andrew

Firstly, I think of playing a late half-round of golf on Fisher’s Island with a couple of beers in the back of the cart…since I would give up on my game after about six holes, and Andrew…well…beer went along with most every activity after 5:00 pm.

He loved that golf course, and he never refused to play with me, even when he knew my game would ultimately deteriorate into ‘picking up’ every other hole.

Secondly, I remember New Year’s Eve, 2003. It wasn’t a stellar year, in Andrew’s and my eyes. Rawleigh had been thrown in a pool, and he and Emily Parsons went home early. So Swedge (he hated that name, so I’ll stop using it now) and I went back to his house to try to catch up with Elly, Nancy, and Blue. Alas, they were in bed, so Andrew and I hung out on the steps between the pool room and his “Love Pad”. I remember talking with him about how everyone always scurries around to find New Year’s plans every year…he said that what he loved about New Year’s at Jupiter Island was that it was guaranteed…he always had a spot at the table. I think he always will.

I’ll always remember his voice. The way he mumbled when his sandwich had pickles, or when his approach shot barely missed the green. The way he danced at a beach party (how those girls would swoon!). Always a presence, always a friend.

-Ben Cameron

It is warm in here, so warm that the snow has melted the back yard and the ground has thawed. I had a huge bag of bulbs that I intended to plant last fall, but the snow came, and I was not ready for it. I have always found so much comfort in putting bulbs in the ground. It is an act of faith, really, trusting the cold winter will provide the nurturing the bulbs need to flourish in the spring. The winter seems so long and the spring so very far off.

So while Katie bemoans the lack of snow, I am grateful. Because today I am going out to the garden with my bag full of bulbs and I am planting daffodils and tulips for Andrew. I will not delay. I know this weather will not last.

So let this winter be a time for rest and recovery. May this spring bring warm breezes and gardens bursting with flowers. May the summer bring low handicaps, boat tubing, and beach bar-b-ques. May the fall bring Yale football glory and renewed hope to us all.

And so Andrew Dwyer, may this year be for you.

--Lisa Dwyer Fielding

Members of the Class were shocked and deeply saddened by the tragic death of ANDREW DWYER in an automobile accident in January. Many wrote in to Alumnet to share their feelings, and many more attended the memorial service for Andrew in Bedford, NY. Andrew's cousin, CHRIS BR00KS, wrote the following tribute to him for Class Notes: "Sitting here watching the NCAA Basketball Tournament, I can't help but remember how much Andrew loved March Madness. Every year Andrew, his father, and I would pick our teams from the tournament bracket and watch the games to see whose teams won the most games. Andrew loved this time of year, but not as much as he loved family, friends, sports teams and Hotchkiss. Whether making announcements for the paddle team with J0HNHY LAND , playing lacrosse on Centennial, avidly cheering at sports events, or participating in the school fashion show, Andrew embraced everything that Hotchkiss had to offer. He was like an unofficial school mascot, embodying the Hotchkiss spirit more than anybody else that I knew. Academically, he was one of the smartest people I knew, even though he would not oppose sacrificing doing his work to pull off a prank, play a paddle tennis match, or watch one of his beloved teams on television or in person; nevertheless, he always received excellent grades. While he initially received the nickname "Dogg" because of his habits and mannerisms, I think CUSHING DONELAN and NATE THORNE put it best when they stated the nickname was more appropriate because Dogg was truly man's best friend. At Hotchkiss, Andrew always supported his friends on the sports field and was always available to help his friends with their problems. Not a day went by when Andrew took Hotchkiss for granted. While we all loved Hotchkiss for the most part, he was the one person who never uttered a complaint about the School because he knew how lucky he was to be at such a place, where he was able to have such experiences. He enjoyed every day that he was at Hotchkiss and the friendships he was able to form with his classmates and the faculty. While those of us who were lucky enough to know him will always have an emptiness inside, we will all happily remember that his friendship made not only our lives at Hotchkiss better but also our lives in general that much more enjoyable for all of us."

Andrew K. Dwyer Andrew Knox Dwyer, 20, of Hobe Sound, Fla., died Jan. 17 in an automobile accident returning to Yale from a trip to New York City. His sudden death brought hundreds of mourners to his memorial service Jan. 21 in Bedford.

Andrew's exuberance for life and the sheer joy he took in his love of 'family and friends was the universal theme expressed at the service by those who knew and loved him.

His sisters Nancy and Elly talked of theunusual closeness among the three siblings. Their brother was their best friend, a young man who shrugged off any notion that it was strange to have an older sister join him and his friends for an evening.

"I Cannot begin to imagine life without Andrew," Nancy said. "He was a gift that entered our lives and changed our family forever. 11

While immediate memories of Andrew focused on his "wacky, goofy" side and his unquestionable loyalty to his friends, there were other elements, his deep intelligence and quick wit that were so much a part of his personality.

Andrew was seldom out-argued and planned to major in political science at Yale. He quickly found solutions to problems, always with a selflessness that led to a multitude of friendships. Nearly all of his friends, whether from Bedford, Hotchkiss, Fishers Island or Yale, considered him their best friend. As a testament to Andrew, those disparate friends now acknowledge a lifelong bond, just having known him.

Andrew was born June 21, 1982 in Bedford, the son of Cynthia and Andrew Dwyer. He was a 1998 honor roll graduate of Rippowam-Cisqua School in Bedford, where he played three varsity sports, and a 2001 honor roll graduate of Hotchkiss School in Lakeville, Conn., where he played varsity lacrosse and captained the paddle tennis team. Andrew was a member of Yale's Class of 2005 and of the fraternity Delta Kappa Epsilon.

An obsessive sports fan, Andrew, known as "Dogg" to his friends, was a tough competitor as well. He and a friend resurrected the dormant paddle tennis team at Hotchkiss and built a new team that defeated Salisbury for the first time in school history.

In spite of the paddle tennis, lacrosse, pick-up basketball games, pool and tubing in front of the Dwyer's house on Fishers Island, Andrew had one overriding passion in sports: golf. Hi's 5.3 handicap tamed courses at both the Fishers Island Club and the Bedford Golf & Tennis Club. It was acknowledged that only an early morning tee time could arouse Andrew, who liked to sleep late.

He also loved spending time at Isabella Beach with his childhood friend Jake Grand, always'acknowledging Fishers Island. as his favorite place to be.

Andrew is remembered affectionately for his idiosyncrasies and his generosity: he embraced cheeseburgers and cheesedogs, never wavering in his rejection of vegetables. He ordered food for friends, day or night, often picking up the tab. He was a sports encyclopedia and never met a prank or a person he did not like. He had the uncanny ability to weave humor into serious situations and always looked for ways to lift the spirits of others. "He was the most loving, caring, compassionate person I ever met. Ever," a friend said.

Andrew's first word was, "Elly. " Speaking at his memorial service, Elly said, 11 ... I know he is laughing, and on occasion dancing. I thank God for blessing my life so much with Andrew. My best brother and my best friend."

Contributions in Andrew's memory may be made to the Andrew K. Dwyer Foundation, 532 Cantitoe Rd, Bedford, NY 10506.

Andrew Dwyer, D C '0 5 Andrew Dwyer, DC '05, never tried to be the center of attention but couldn't help being the life of the party. "He was the guy you wanted to be around, the guy who cheered you up if you needed cheering up at 3 a.m.," friend Andy Levy, BK '05, said.

Andrew was never too busy to cheer his friends on during Yale football games. "He was at every one," his roommate Eric Diamond, DC '05, said. "He'd show up at the tailgates at 9 a.m. [when] we usually couldn't get him up before noon."

Andrew had a passion for sports and his classes were scheduled around Yankees games. He loved the Jets, and when they lost in the first round of the 2003 playoffs, he put his hand on his forehead, shook his head, and told his sister, "Eli, now I have to go home and watch a lot of Joe Millionaire."

Many afternoons of hanging out turned into wrestling matches whether with Levy, who happened to be on the football team, or Diamond. Andrew told his father that some of his best times at Yale were those afternoons of just messing around with his friends.

Andrew thought about spending a year in Colorado after graduation to ski and have a good time. He' joked about becoming the youngest owner of the Yankees. He didn't waste his time worrying, dedicating himself to being the consummate son, always ready to go whitewater rafting with his family, a friend, always up for a sausage, egg and, cheese sandwich at the Yankee Doodle, and a brother called "the Golden Child" by his two older sisters. "He really enjoyed life," Diamond said. "Everywhere he went, he was happy."

Andrew's parents made t-shirts for his DKE brothers and his best friends. On the shirts, "dogg," his nickname, is written out in black letters under a photo of Andrew smiling. Under this are the words of poet W.B. Yeats: "Think where man's glory most begins and ends, and say my glory was I had such friends."

--Kristen Thompson

Andrew Dwyer '05

BY ERICA YOUNGSTROM Staff Reporter

Andrew Dwyer'05 was a late-night eater and a feeder of friends.

One night last week at the Delta Kappa Epsilon house, for example, Dwyer asked those gathered if they wanted anything to eat. After ordering food for everyone who wanted it, Dwyer picked up the tab.

His friends say this kind of generosity was typical of Dwyer, who was well known for his friendliness and concern for others.

At The Hotchkiss School, the Connecticut boarding school he attended before Yale, Dwyer was known for taking care of his classmates.

"He was famous in the dorms here at Hotchkiss for providing sustenance for his friends at late hours, all hours of the day," said Chris Burchfield, Dwyer's senior year English teacher and varsity lacrosse coach. "A really fun part of the tradition for Andrew and all of his buddies was ~ getting together late at night, probably having studied for several hours and taking a break, cramming into one room and making hamburgers or sandwiches or something like that. It established a real bond between that group of friends.

A native of Hobe Sound, Fla., Dwyer planned to major in political science and, friends said, "never met a prank he didn't like." He was nicknamed "Dogg" by his friends at Yale and always was best known for his interest in athletics and spending time with his friends.

Dwyer spent Thursday night in New York City with friends from DKE. He was returning to campus with eight DKE brothers when the sport utility vehicle they were driving collided with a tractor-trailer. Dwyer and three other students died of injuries resulting from the crash.

At Yale, Dwyer's deepest interests lay with the "simple pleasures" of life, friends said. He especially enjoyed his involvement with his fraternity, as well as sports and opportunities to relax with friends.

"He always really lifted everyone's spirits," said Tony Bellino'05, Dwyer's roommate. "He was everyone's friend."

Andrew Levy '05, a close friend, said Dwyer genuinely cared about the way others felt and that he brought out the best in people.

"The thing that made Andrew unique was that he liked everyone. I never heard him say a bad word about anyone," Levy said.

Bellino described him as an avid golfer who also enjoyed playing paddle tennis with his family. Dwyer would also play squash regularly with Eric Diamond '05, another of his suitemates.

"He was a sports nut," Bellino said. "He was like a sports encyclopedia."

Frequently, Dwyer would regale friends with sports facts while watching games on television, his suitemates said. Often he would mention background information before the announcer'did.

Dwyer was also an avid TV buff and loved to relax with suitemates watching "Seinfeld," "The Simpsons" and "Joe Millionaire" ?? which his suitemates said he watched seven times. Last Christmas., he. was excited to receive a TiVo, a device that allows viewers to record, pause, or rewind television program.

A particular favorite of Dwyer's was "The Lord of the Rings," the newest installment of which he saw as soon as it opened on Wednesday, Dec. 18, despite the fact that it was finals week.

"All of us had finals on Wednesday, and we went to the 12:05 a.m. showing," Diamond said.

Dwyer's teachers and coaches at Hotchkiss also remembered Dwyer as fun-loving and upbeat.

"His main interest was people. He was very much a people person. He had a smile on his face and a twinkle in his eye most of the time," said John Virden, Dwyer's faculty adviser at Hotchkiss.

Burchfield said he was not surprised to hear that when Dwyer spent time away from school, it was with a group of friends. He said Dwyer's most unique gift was the way in which he connected with others.

"He was rarely without a grin on his face and he had this sort of charming way of glancing at you with this half a grin that you knew would be a full grin the minute he made eye contact with you," Burchfield said. "It was just funny the way he could reach you."

During day to day life at Hotchkiss, Dwyer enjoyed spending time with his many close friends, particularly fellow athletes. Burchfield recalled that Dwyer was especially close to his lacrosse teammates.

"The joy of playing and being on a team was where Andrew's heart was, and he was a loved teammate," Burchfield said.

Burchfield said Dwyer was a strong student and a talented writer who was never afraid to say what he thought during class discussions.

Both Virden and Burchfield recalled Dwyer's sense of humor. While Virden said Dwyer "never met a prank he didn't love," Dwyer could also thoughtfully incorporate humor into many other situations.

"He could make a comment that was funny but that was also relevant to what was being discussed, and that was a pretty amazing talent," Burchfield said.

Dwyer's friends at Yale said he was very busy with DKE events during the week after winter break, but also continued to spend time with them and be there when they needed encouragement.

"The last time I saw the kid, he was trying to cheer me up," said C.J. Orrico'05, Dwyer's suitemate.

Many other friends remembered Dwyer's efforts to lift their spirits, whether it was by inviting them to go out for a good time, bringing them a snack, or simply offering a bright smile and some comic relief.

"He was the most loving, caring, compassionate person I ever met," Levy said. "Ever."

Andrew Dwyer is survived by his parents and two older sisters. A service in his memory will be at I I a.m. today at St. Matthew's Church in Bedford, N.Y.